The future is in South Sudan.
In the intestines we will have a giant water slide, and soda will come out of all the drinking fountains.
A) Name the newest country.
1. America
2. South Osseia
3. South Sudan
4. South America
The answer, of course, is relative. Should we consider South America a “real country,” when all of its citizens are mexicans? I don’t consider mexicans unique enough for them to have their own country.
South Sudan, on the other hand. Now that is a country that knows how to think outside the box. For example: All of their capital cities are going to look like animals. I can see many advantages to this.
However, not everyone else can. For example, near-sided aid workers. Like Nora Petty, who’s quoted by the Associated Press saying: “It doesn’t seem like the (Government of Southern Sudan) should be using its resources or staff time when the people of Southern Sudan lack basic services like health care and water.” No wonder she’s called “petty.”
You know who else lacks “basic services like health care”? Literally millions of Americans. Me, for example. I don’t know that I would call it a “basic service.”
And besides, we squander too much money in Africa. Doesn’t it all go to tyrants, and warlords, and rapists? At least now we can see where are money is going, and whether or not it’s spent efficiently. Like literally, you can just look it up on Google Earth. If there is a city that looks like a Rhinoceros, then good job!
Plus it makes for some interesting urban planning. Who, for example, will be forced to live in the ass? Will there be prostitutes in the crotch region? Scientists in the brain?
Another big plus: this whole dealo will only cost $10 billion dollars. So basically, for the money we spent on the stimulus we could have had a veritable zoo of animal-shaped cities. Nice going, Obama (note sarcasm).
So good job, South Sudan. Not even a country yet, and you’re already “trending” on Yahoo!
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